The Story Behind "Day By Day"

This album has been a long time coming. Lets start with February 2014... when I walked away from the stage (for what I thought was) the final time after the last American Firehouse tour stop in Daytona, Fl.

It wasn’t some big retirement announcement. There was no farewell show. I’d just reached a point where, after enough disappointments of not feeling like was reaching enough people and enough times thinking the next break might finally be the one, I was tired of chasing it. At the same time, my life was starting to change in a pretty big way as well, especially with three kids back at home.

So I stopped performing, on the spot.

But I never stopped writing.

For the next twelve years, life gave me plenty to write about. I got older. My kids got older. Jobs changed. Bills kept coming. There were good years and hard ones. There were fire calls, football fields, long drives to work, arguments, prayers, doubts, mistakes, and plenty of nights wondering whether I was getting any of this right.

Somewhere along the way, the songs changed too. I wasn’t trying to write what I thought country radio wanted anymore. I wasn’t trying to get somebody in Nashville to notice me. I was just writing about my life. 

And that’s really what Day By Day is. These are the songs I chose from those years.

There are songs about working your ass off and still feeling like you can’t get ahead. The Clouds probably says that better than anything I’ve written. It’s about running as hard as you can, only to look up and realize the only thing that seems to be changing is the sky above you.

There are songs about reaching the point where you just need life to give you a damn minute. Not because you hate your job or your responsibilities, but because you’re tired of watching your life go by while you’re busy trying to keep up with it. That became I Need A Break.

There are songs about marriage and relationships, including the uncomfortable parts. Nothing Left To Say came from that place where you’ve tried talking, tried silence, tried holding on, tried walking away, and eventually realize there might not be another sentence that fixes it.

There are songs about being a dad. About wondering if you’re doing enough. About knowing your kids are eventually going to grow up and leave, no matter how badly part of you wants another year. Being Your Dad is probably one of the most personal songs on this record because I’m not pretending to have fatherhood figured out. I’m just trying to show up.

Faith is here too, but not the polished version of it.

Are You Still There asks questions I think a lot of people are afraid to say out loud. Can you doubt and still believe? Can you be angry and still pray? Maybe faith isn’t always having the answer. Maybe sometimes it’s just continuing the climb.

And of course, the fire service is part of this record because it’s been part of nearly my entire adult life. Some of these songs go back years. They carry the people, calls, sacrifices, and experiences that helped shape who I became.

There’s small-town life in here too. Friday night football. Old country music. Neighbors who might disagree about just about everything but still show up when somebody needs help. There’s a porch light left on when the rest of the world seems determined to convince us we’re all enemies.

And there’s some perspective I definitely didn’t have in 2014.

Don’t Wait On Ready is a song I wrote for my daughter after she graduated high school, about some of the things I wish I understood when I was younger. You can waste a lot of years waiting to make a move until you have everything figured out. The truth is, you probably never will. Sometimes you just have to trust what you know, put your feet on the ground, and go.

That might also explain why this album exists. Twelve years ago, I thought walking away from the stage meant that chapter of my life was over. Maybe it was. Because I’m not trying to go back and become the guy I was then. I’m 42 now. I’ve got different things to say. I’ve lived enough life to know that most of it isn’t made up of huge moments anyway.

It’s work. Family. Faith. Doubt. Love. Disappointment. Showing up. Screwing up. Trying again. Day by day.

And maybe that’s the biggest thing I’ve learned through all of it. For a long time, I thought I needed something in my life to change. A different break. A different road. Something bigger. Now I’m starting to understand that sometimes the life you’re waiting for is the one you’re already living.

I don’t know where this record or my career goes from here, and for once, I’m okay with that. Whether people call me to play or they don't, I'm contempt with knowing I finally told a good part of my story for the first time. 

These are fourteen songs chosen from years of living. They’re my stories. It’s actually my first real album when you stop and think about it, if you don’t count the American Firehouse project, and I’ve been humbled by everything that’s gone into making it.

Maybe somewhere in these songs, you’ll hear a little bit of your own story too.

-Paul